BE-DO-HAVE

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How many times have we or other people said, “If only I had that promotion with that salary, then I’d be happy.” We are over-focusing on that ideal job, discovering the career we intend to pursue or going after the next promotion, as a way of creating meaning in life.

 

This mindset causes you to suffer or to lose energy when you are without the ideal job. If ever you do get the ideal job, the joy you gain is often short-lived. Life purpose is bigger than the position you hold. It is about commitment that goes beyond the job title. It transcends the position so that the life purpose can be fulfilled, whether or not you have the position. The point is this: Leadership is not about a position. Genuinely transformative leadership can only exist in the absence of self-interest.

 

When you are able to extend your life purpose beyond self-interest, you will realize the true meaning of life. Some people get caught in the trap that life purpose is solely personal. It’s not just about what you have to achieve or what you intend to have in your life.

 

The “Be-Do-Have” mindset

 

You have to be something, in order to be able to do something, that will allow you to have something. Nature dictates action, and action will produce the breakthroughs you intend to have in your life.

 

A lot of times, we are confused with this process. We usually try to perform or to act so that we can have the breakthrough we intend for our lives. We try to force our way into having a great job and a high salary, when we have not become the Space for success. Do you get what I am saying here? If it is not in your being, your actions will lack integrity. When your actions lack integrity, it will reflect in the fruits they produce.

 

Other times, people follow a “have-do-be” mindset. They think that if only they have this or that, that they can do this and that, and they become something. For example, people think that if they have a million dollars that they can give to the poor and they can become a philanthropist. However, we have to change this mindset. You can start by being generous. In your generosity, you can give with all your heart what the Lord has entrusted to you. The Lord said, you reap what you sow. The product of you being generous and giving to the poor will be more blessings to impart.

 

Leaders have to be genuine servants and stewards. It is only through the integrity of their beings where they will be able to perform true service and stewardship. As a result, they would be able to bring about true transformation to the group.

 

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Which mindset are you living out? The Be-Do-Have or Do-Have-Be?

Humanity is the highest level of ourselves.

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We are part of humanity. Humanity is the highest level of ourselves. Humanity is part of who we are. Whatever we make of our lives matter on an individual level, but more than that, it matters to how humanity is shaped.

According to Erhard, creating a context of a world that works for everyone is not simply a step to move humanity forward. Instead, it is the context by which our history will begin to make sense. Transformation fulfills what has gone before it. You and I have a role in the process.

In the words of Albert Schweitzer, “I don’t know what your destiny will be, but one thing I know: The only ones among you who will be truly happy are those who have sought and found how to serve.” We cannot live for ourselves. Genuine happiness, on an individual level, can only be experienced by serving others; by serving humanity.

 

Service of others is not an easy thing to give. You expand yourself; you expand your ability when you serve. The process of meeting the challenge of delivering the needs of others enables you to grow as an individual person.

Serving others is a huge project in itself. What can you do for humanity? The Bible says you are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). This means you were not mass-produced. You have a unique skills set. You have a unique role to play in this world.

Erhard tells us that we must decide what project we are willing to take complete responsibility for. Commit to this project. Ron Smothermon (1980) tells us that relationships exist within defined boundaries. People have a certain level of expectations toward us. If others cannot expect any commitment from us, then there is no true relationship. We communicate commitment in our relationships.

In any relationship, we are the ones who will decide whether commitments can be spoken or unspoken, and we are the ones who will clarify and define the commitments or even avoid making any commitments (Smothermon, 1980).

However, we must know that relationships wherein commitments do not exist do not actually work. Whether you claim that you do not know the essence commitment or you do not know how to commit, you are still responsible for declaring this with the people involved, most especially to those who are expecting something from you.

As you express your commitment, you can trigger others to do the same. This is already a step closer towards creating a world that works for everyone. Your willingness to express yourself in commitment is an essential part the process. Do not wait for something to happen to you before you commit to transforming the world. Erhard tells us to take responsibility for making something happen. Keep at it until you create a successful experience for everyone.  Find a mirror; look at the person staring back at you. Tell that person, “You can make a difference.”

 

 

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What difference is God calling you to make?

Community and Success

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Success in reaching the goals set is achieved through relationships with others. The future is constantly created through conversations with others – asking and creating commitments, making requests and promises through actions. The successful coordination of relationships is the coordination of commitments expressed in the acts of language (Selman, 2007).

Language and communication play an important role in our relationships while relationships also play part in our success as a community. When we set and try to meet a goal as an individual, it is just normal to have other people help us meet that goal. How much more if we, as a community, set a goal and try to meet it? It should give us better results than us as individuals.

As a community, we should make sure that we develop a culture that forms relationships that will be a strong foundation. When we develop that kind of culture, it brings us halfway to success because it puts us in a position where, we can stay strong despite adversity and trials.

As we often say, and we will not be tired of saying, two heads are better than one. We should see each other through. It must be instilled among us that our success is also our community’s success; and our failures are also our community’s failures. As it was written, if one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it (1 Corinthians 12:26).

 

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Leadership and Transformation

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Transformation that alters society, organization and relationships begins with a transformation of ourselves (Possibilities: the future of humanity NA). In order for us to make a difference in the other levels of self, we should begin it within us. To quote Mahatma Gandhi as he once said, “be the change you wish to see in the world.” When we begin it in ourselves, it is much easier to relay the idea of change to other people.

The discipline of transformation is about learning to shape our world in a way that supports and compliments our commitments and vision. This work is grounded on the premise that action is not random, but is determined by what we see as possible and what we intend to achieve (Possibilities: the future of humanity, n.d.).

As we transform, we begin to see that this transformation that began in us shifts towards the world around us. A good example of this is Thomas Alva Edison. To quote what he once said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that would not work.” His individual transformation as an inventor helped not only him, but also the whole humanity.

He has served not only his individual transformation but the transformation of the world around him. Without God gracing us with his gifting, commitment and passion, we would not be enjoying bright nights.

GROUP TRANSFORMATION PRINCIPLE 55:

Leadership does not only happen inside an individual

Leadership does not only happen inside an individual, but in the context of relationships and in the coordination of actions and practices in a community (Selman, 2007). The individual transformation and the community level of self are dependent on each other. This is most especially true with regards to individual transformation. How Kim Krisco expressed it in his book, Leadership and the Art of Conversation, is exceptional:

“You have to look over human history to understand that you, like every other human being, have the power to do what seems impossible. You have the power, in large part, because you create and maintain conversations that can be shared, not only with friends, family, organizations, and institutions, but with your community and even the entire world.” (Krisco, 1997, p.179)

What happens in us also happens to the world around us. We may not know it or even notice it, but regardless — the world we create in us radiates around us. What we say and declare we put to action. We are all leaders – it is just a question of where we lead other people.

As people who are innate leaders, we ought to be careful of what we say and declare to ourselves and to the people around us. For where we go, our followers will go.

 

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What are you creating in the world today?

WE

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As an individual, we see little. However, as we begin to see our relationships, and how our individual selves affect our groups and organizations – Thus, we affect our society. Then, our world.

 

Trust is not always a good thing. Trust can be foolish, naïve, gullible, and blind. And trust ought never to be taken for granted. That is why we insist that the issue is building trust – that is creating trust, maintaining trust, restoring trust once it has been lost or betrayed (Solomon & Flores, 2001).

Trusting people has never been easy with most people, especially nowadays, when a lot of broken promises and betrayals come into people’s lives. There are a lot of husbands and wives being unfaithful to their lifetime partners. Stories of betrayal and broken promises that are widespread nowadays affect how people trust. Different people react to loss of trust differently. Some close up and find it hard to trust again. Some do not give their trust at all while there are others who are brave enough to trust again.

However, it is undeniable that communities are built on trust. In a community, we acknowledge that we cannot do everything at the same time – we acknowledge that we need other people to accomplish things that we can’t. In view of this idea, it is essential that we nurture trust in our relationships with the members of our community.

As Solomon and Flores put it, also quoting Vaclav Havel; for all of us, in our roles as citizens and consumers, in our roles as leaders and as members of the world community, “we have to learn to trust one another” (Solomon & Flores, 2001).

 

People in organizations who trust one another in a richer, more flexible, and more innovative environment flourish accordingly (Solomon & Flores, 2001). Upon achieving a trusting attitude among your community, we begin to work together as one. However, as we work together, there would come a time when we would fail each other.

In the event of failing, we tend to lose our trust on people. However, this should not go on for so long. Proper communication within the organization should be implemented to ensure understanding among the members. As Flaherty put it, experience is what shapes our understanding so that we can know at a glance what the appropriate action is (Flaherty, 2010). When we nurture understanding first before we react, we respond. When we respond, we open our minds and hearts to receive the reason why things had happened against our plans or expectations.

We should not be afraid to confront. What makes us afraid to confront is misunderstanding. But, we should see to it that we understand things first before we wage a war or say our opinions out loud. It will lessen tendencies of clashes inside the organization. It will nurture an environment of understanding and care for each other rather than putting our egos first.

A corporation (or any institution) is not a mob. Every institution is also an organization, which means that it has some procedure (whether democratic, authoritarian, or by way of a small board officers) for making decisions (Solomon & Flores, 2001). Our levels of self, if not organized, will not be able to work together as one.

Our levels of self are all organizations. Even as an individual, we are an organized body of systems physically. When one part is not functioning well, everything is affected. Everyone does not have the same function as well. As it is written, if the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? But in fact God has placed the parts of the body, every one of them, just as He intended them to be. If they were all one part, where would the body be? (1 Corinthians 12:17-19).

 

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How are you being disorganized?

You Need to Hear This Today

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“Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them!” (Psalm 139:16-17). Everything God has created is special. But, He has made man, even more special because He has thought of us and created us in a different way than anything else.

In fact, He has made us in His image and likeness (Genesis 1:26-27). He even blessed us to rule over His creation. He has thought of you even before you were born! You are a special individual – created by God. Nowadays, people tend to look down on themselves. It is because they have lost sight of who they really are in God’s eyes. Each one has a destiny waiting for them. He knows the friends you will be making, the work you will doing, the family you will be in, the talents and abilities He will grace you with. He knows the very number of your hair up to the very soles of your feet.

You are a special individual. He is the one who knows how to transform you. He is the one who transforms you into the person you ought to be. He is the one who knows your destiny and everything that you are. He is the One who gives you the vision and the One who strengthens you. If there is someone you must ask about your life, it is Him.

As you ponder on this truth, keep in mind that this does not only speak of you. This also speaks of others. The people around you are also special individuals made by God.

Do not be conformed any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – His good, pleasing and perfect will (Romans 12:2). Our life stories do not necessarily go on smooth. There would always be trials and persecutions along the way. God did not promise a problem-free life, but He did promise that He will be with us along the way (Psalm 34:19-20).

 

Just like a diamond going through fire, we go through numbers of pressures in life. But, it is not to harm us but to shape our character and to build us in Him. The things we experience – whether good or bad – transform us into the person God ought us to be.

In Moses’ life, his salvation, his individual transformation was very amazing. However, it would have stayed stagnant if it did not translate into the whole Israelite community. But it was a great thing that he fulfilled what he was meant to do.

As Ron Smothermon wrote it, individuals create the remaining destiny of mankind (Smothermon, 1982, p.127). You are an important part of everything else that is happening around. You are not an accident or just an accessory. You were made for something even greater than what you can even imagine for yourself. For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do (Ephesians 2:10).

 

 

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The Power of Experience

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Human behavior is the result of a weaving of innate and learned experiences (Budd & Rothestein, 2000, p.98). We can say that behavior does not define our being but we can also say that it is part of our being. And, experiences do shape not only our behavior but also the things that we are – how we respond, how we do things, how we speak, etc.

Experience seems to be a vital part of transformation because it provides a baseline of transformation. It makes you differentiate the former state from the transformed state. It makes you appreciate the transformed state because it is the one who honed it to be the way it is.

People should not be wary about experiencing new things. As Socrates had put it, wonder is the beginning of wisdom. The learned would not be who they are if they did not experience things. Experience transforms us into the person we are. It either builds us or breaks us – but at the end of the day, it transforms us – if not, others.

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What new experience can you try out this month?

The Need to Connect

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We humans are made relational beings. As we work, getting to the end-goal is not only our concern. We also have to think about others whom we work with. As written in Transformational Leadership, relationship form entities in and of themselves, and a step-function improvement in relationship results can provide the transformative energy had to shift the results of the entire organization (Hacker & Roberts, 2003, p.4)

Whether we are a leader or a subordinate of an organization, we form relations with each other. It is just right to say that we must nurture these relationships with the other members of our team because it will greatly affect how our vision will materialize. Sometimes, we would have to deal with clashes in ideas. But, it should never result into division because this condition is actually conducive for the transformation of each member.

But to each one of us grace has been given as Christ apportioned it. It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers, to prepare God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up (Ephesians 4:7,10-12). All of us have God-given talents and abilities. In fact, the only thing that hinders a person to fully enjoy these God-given things is ignorance.

A sense of self is critical to our status as persons. In fact philosophers often use the terms self and person interchangeably: a capacity for self-awareness is necessary for full personhood (Barrett, 2010). Self-awareness or a person’s consciousness about himself is vital in making him see his full potential.

Sometimes, timidity may also be a factor why people cannot unleash their true potential. People should be more open to explore the things that may make them an even better part of their community.

 

 

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Who should you connect with today?

 

THE INDIVIDUAL

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In the levels of self, the foundation is the individual self. Nobody can get to the other levels without going through first with the individual level. It is the baseline of everything that happens in the different levels. It is the one that makes all of the levels. One should nurture himself so that he can also nurture others. When the inner man is filled, it overflows.

It takes a high degree of commitment to begin the journey of understanding yourself at a deeper level. It takes the journey of understanding yourself at a deeper level. It takes courage to look and accept, without self-judgement, the self-imposed barriers you fashion. But the rewards of self-knowledge are great (Hacker & Roberts, 2003, p.119). A person’s life is a journey of self-discovery. It is an adventure that reveals oneself not only to his own but also to others.

Many times, people start on the wrong side of the race. One reason why, according to Hacker and Roberts is that many people believe that the document must be perfect and complete. Quite the opposite is intended. The life plan is a lifelong working document. Begin with an imperfect version, knowing that you will enhance it over time. The key is to start (Hacker & Roberts, 2003, p.135).

If we intend to transform – if we intend something new, we have to start it within us. There would always be things that we cannot change, but the key is to get that vision within ourselves and to work on it. We have to be the first one to believe that the vision we got – no matter impossible it may seem – is possible. The process might be excruciating, but a tree won’t grow if it did not get out of its seed.

 

 

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How is God calling you to grow in this season?

How To Contribute to a “You AND Me” World?

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The first thing we must show is to respect other people’s point of view. It does not matter if you agree with it or not. You must create a space by which you are able to respect the opinions of others.  If people recognize their history, their circumstances, and the forces that are at play in their lives, it is possible for you to agree with their points of view as well. Consider life as a privilege. All of life must be seen as a gift. Even the parts that seem difficult or mediocre must be appreciated. It is from this context that you will begin to experience a meaningful life.

Let go of the contents that reinforce mediocrity in your life, the safe places where gossip and complaints tend to grow. One must eliminate contents that lead us to be petty.

Take a chance. We must be willing to put our reputation at stake to stand out. Life is about integrity, not about image. Work for satisfaction instead of credit.

You must always keep your word. You are your language. If you cannot keep your word, then who you are is a liar. There can be times in your life where you will forget who you are and what you are about. This is when you must show commitment to keeping your word. Make what you say count.

 

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How are you living out a grateful mindset today?

Do You Believe the World Can Work for You and Me?

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A World that Works for You and Me

What is the number one killer of progress and transformation in any group of people? Apathy. The thing is, when people do not care, the world will not work. The picture of a world that works looks like people who are “audacious” enough to take the responsibility for the entire human race. This means, people have to start caring in order for true transformation to take place.

 

A “survival of the fittest” mentality does not produce transformation. It does not do anything for quality of life. In this mentality, it is every person for himself or herself. One does not care about the other’s welfare as long as one is provided for and protected. This mentality will only promote survival, nothing more.

 

Let’s take the cue from Jesus. He tells us that the most important thing is love (Matthew 22:37-39). He came because of love (John 3:16). Paul tells us that above anything else, love remains (1 Corinthian 13:4).

 

And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. (Matthew 22:37-39)

 

Each person holds the opportunity to make a difference in this world. In fact, we have the power to create a world that works for all of us. However, it is not an easy task. It requires courage. It requires responsibility and commitment. It requires love. Take a step forward: “What we create together is a relationship in which our work can show up as making a difference in people’s lives…If not you, who? If not now, when? If not here, where?”

 

We have been raised and educated in a “you or me” world, wherein it is not natural for us to think we can truly make a difference in the world. We do aspire to live meaningful lives and to impact the world in a positive way, but it usually goes against how we are programmed to function. A “you and me” world requires for us to  work out a new set of rules of living on your own.

 

 

 

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How are you promoting a “you AND me” world?

Context: The Story of Your Life

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Context determines the story of your life. Context is the space by which your life is happening. Mediocrity is a sign that you are living as a content of your experience, rather than the context that authors and qualifies your life. As a content of experience, you are powerless and limited. Thus, this makes it more likely for you to say, “I doubt my life matters.” Significance comes from your personal choice to be responsible and commitment to be significant.

I want to encourage you to see a context wherein if I make a difference, then everybody makes a difference. The rule under this particular context is that it is either “everybody makes a difference” or “nobody makes a difference”. We observe here how having a life that matters is more of a group thing, rather than an individual state of being. It is in this context that we can create a world that works for “you and me,” rather than “you or me.”

 

 

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What story do you want to tell about your life?